I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
