Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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