hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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