I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
I smell like Dick and happiness
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
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