I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
