spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
it was like eating out sand paper
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
