Porn is love you can see.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
