Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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