i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize