I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
