I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Randomize
