hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
why is half of my head shaved?
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
