YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
