Yo dont text me then not text me
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Randomize
