what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Randomize
