Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
