There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
