we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
