A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
