I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
