Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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