His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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