i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
