New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
