How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
