i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
I got married tonight..
I'd like to first of all congratulate you on your marriage. Secondly, probably one of the best drunk texts I've ever received. Unless you were sober, then that text was awkward.
Randomize
