He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
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