We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
