Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
