How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
God gave him joint rollers for hands
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Randomize
