he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
