Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Randomize