She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
