Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Randomize
