someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
