gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Randomize
