make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Its about making memories worth repressing
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
