in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
