In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
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