I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
