jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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