I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
