If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Randomize
