I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Randomize
