its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
