it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
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