Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
