I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Randomize
