he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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