Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry countchocula1188 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(415): View more from California

This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations

Fav 7 1013 1659
share tweet
(704): View more from North Carolina

it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand

Fav 24 3012 768
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(727): View more from Florida

Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...

Fav 16 4904 1296
share tweet
(404): View more from Georgia

Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.

Fav 20 4922 836
share tweet
(716): View more from New York

I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.

Fav 39 1366 4171
share tweet
(216): View more from Ohio

Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know

Fav 25 1338 5515
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(410): View more from Maryland

Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"

(1-410): View more from Maryland

How come I never meet celebrities?

Fav 7 3759 1123
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.

Fav 0 356 524
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(928): View more from Arizona

They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...

Fav 0 30 8
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT